Monoga-Monster

I have hit a snag with my "March to the Finish" or "Monogamous March" commitment. I haven't fallen off the yarn bus, but I'm finding it difficult not to hit the driver over the head, and run off with all of the yarn. Here's my problem. March is a great month for a stash spring cleaning. March is a perfect month for finishing up those old UFOs before the summer knitting begins. March is also my birthday month. This is a good thing for me, but it's a bad thing for my UFOs. I just received a birthday gift. These beautiful yarns are like woolly sirens.



How am I supposed to stay faithful to "The Vest of Shame"? How can I possibly slog through two different second socks, with this around?



I am feeling like a beer lover who just decided to kick the habit the day before Octoberfest. I'm trying hard to focus on the task at hand, but I can't stop peeking at the new arrivals.





There's a comedy album by Chris Rock, in which he says that "Men are only as faithful as their options". While I don't believe that, I do believe that I might have a serious problem with project monogamy. I'm starting to dislike the "M" word. It's reminiscent of my days in Catholic school, and not in a good way. It makes me feel like I'm wearing an itchy kilt, listening to sister Virginia Marie go on and on about the virtues of being a "follower". Maybe, I'm a polygamous project knitter. Maybe, I'm not cut out for all of this pious knitting. I can't give up on my commitment, but I'm unable to focus on the task at hand while all of those beautiful yarns are parading around my dining room table. I can't stop thinking about the possibilities. I'm beginning to think that the most seductive things in life, are the things that could happen.
When all of this Catholic school style knitting is over, I'm going to put on my Roman toga and cast on for a ludicrous number of projects. It's going to be Ape S*&t April this year.